Communicating Week 4

This week I evaluated myself as a communicator and also had my mom and friend evaluate me.  My mom scored me almost exactly as I scored myself in the anxiety section.  I hate public speaking and speaking in small groups.  I feel that I do a terrible job at it and leave an awful impression.  It surprised me to see my mom thinking I leave a positive impression.  Our biggest discrepancy was in the aggressive session.  I have a temper and my mom knows it, but she has not seen it in full swing!  I tend to be more aggressive with people I have known for a long time and not newly met people.

My friend was very much on target with me.  She has been my best friend for about 30 years!  She knows me better than I know myself.  Like my mom she thinks I do well with public speaking, even though my voice is cracking and my body is shaking!

This assignment was very  insightful.  Where I think I lack confidence others see as positive outcomes.  I'm hoping knowing this will help me become more comfortable when I need to speak in public, but this is still something I will never volunteer to do!

Communicating with different groups

I find that I do communicate differently with people of other groups or cultures.  I notice that I tend to be different towards people with a higher status than I.  This is evident in my workplace.  I can have a normal, talk about anything conversation with my colleagues.  When I have to discuss things with the principals, or have meetings with them,I am very uncomfortable and I tend to pay more attention to my body language and grammar.  Sometimes I feel that this hinders me in that I am not showing them my knowledge and confidence because I feel intimidated.

Three strategies that I try to use when communicating with higher status individuals are:
1)  To overlook who they are and talk to them as normal people. 
2)  I need to respect their position but also be open and honest about my views and to communicate that in a respectful manner.
3)  Be open to their ideas, suggestions and/or criticisms. 

Nonverbal Communication

For this assignment, I chose to view the show Hot in Cleveland.  I have never seen this show before but heard of it.  For the first part of the lesson, I watched it with no sound.  It started off with one of the characters on the phone and two other females sitting at the table.   The person on the phone was obviously very upset about something.  This was obvious to me because she had her free hand waving in the air and her facial expression was very apparent.  Betty White was then shown talking to another girl that had come down stairs dressed in a robe.  It appeared that Betty White, who plays Elka, made a sarcastic remark to Joy.  I noticed that Elka moved in closer to Joy when she spoke to her and did some pointing with her fingers.  The other characters faces showed a stunned look which led me to believe that a sarcastic or rude remark had been made.

When I watched the show again with the sound on, I found my assumptions to be correct.  Melanie was on the phone with the drycleaner.  She was upset because the drycleaner lost her favorite dress.  After Melanie hung up the phone, you could hear Joy upstairs getting ready to come down.  Melanie and Victoria said to be nice to Joy because it was the anniversary of Joy being left at the altar.  When Joy sat down next to Elka, she had a dried bouquet of flowers, and Elka made the comment “what are you doing with that old dried up thing?”  Joy said they were her flowers and Elka commented that she was talking to the flowers.   

Even though I am not familiar with this program, I found it easy to figure out what was happening with the body language.  I learned from this assignment that facial expressions really tell us what a person is thinking or feeling.

Competent Communicator

The person I chose to write about is my RVP at my second job.  He is a fabulous communicator.  The following traits make him great:
1)  He is personable.
2)  He is passionate about his career.
3)  He brings in life experience and shares it with the other agents and clients.
4)  He brings humor to the conversation.
5)  He listens.
6)  He is very knowledgeable about the job and can ask/answer questions with confidence.

I am still new in this business, but I look forward to our weekly meetings, just to get pumped up by his enthusiasm.  He is so willing to help people out and to take them under his wing to give the support necessary.  I definitely want to become a great communicator like him.  I am developing the enthusiasm about the company, and in time I will  have the  confidence and knowledge to be more comfortable talking with clients. 

Professional Hopes and Goals

One of my hopes in working with children and families of other diversities is to make them feel welcomed and appreciated.  I think that it is important that we make children feel accepted wherever they go.  I plan on doing this by interacting with my colleagues to gain insights about cultures I may not be familiar with and to find ways to include these families into our learning environment.

A goal I have is to teach children that we are not all the same, but that being different is okay.  I think that we need to start with our youngest children first and teach them about different cultures.  For me, learning about the "ism's" during the course, demonstrates a lack of education on other diversities.  By educating youngsters, we may be able to make a difference in years to come where we won't have any or at least minimal prejudices and biases.

To all my colleagues I want to say thank you for all your correspondences and opinions.  I have learned so much from each one of you.  I look forward to having more courses with you in the future.  Good luck with all your endeavors!

Welcoming Families From Around the World

The country origin for my family is Romania.

The five ways I will prepare for my family are:

1.        I will research their Romania and learn all I can about the culture.

2.       I will talk with colleagues and try to find out any information they may have about Romania.

3.       If the family’s language is different from English, I will have a translator help me write a welcoming letter to the family.

4.       Through my research, I will devise a lesson on the culture of Romania and invite the family to share their culture with the class.

5.       I will develop a list of organization contacts for the family to make the transition to the United States easier for them.

I feel that with these steps, I will make the family feel welcomed to their new home.  I think the most important message I can send to the family is that I respect their culture and am willing to accommodate their needs.  The language barrier will be the most important aspect to overcome, and I know there are wonderful websites/programs that are available for translations.

The Personal Side of Bias, Prejudice and Oppression

A moment that I remember of witnessing bias, prejudice or oppression is one that I heard about from my cousin.  It involved my cousin and uncle who both have their pilot licenses and live in Arizona.  They were both very prejudice of anyone outside the white race.  One day while flying, they spotted a group of Native Americans; so they decided to fly extremely low around them.  They did this several times, causing the Native Americans to be ducking.  Upon the fourth pass by, my cousin realized that the group was gathered for a funeral.  My uncle and cousin felt bad afterwards, and left them alone.

This act diminished equity in that all cultures have the right to mourn or show respect for the deceased.  With the ceremony being interrupted by the plane flying low, it was disrespectful to the living and also the deceased.

When my cousin told me about this I became so enraged.  I was ashamed to consider them my family.  I was also upset because our heritage includes Native American.  Our great grandmother was full blooded Cherokee.  This act was a disgrace to our family. 

My uncle and cousin since this act have changed their ways.  They have turned their lives around and appreciate that every person has the right to live their lives as fit.  I am no longer embarrassed to go out with them because I know that there will be no bias remarks made.   This incident was a total eye opener especially for my cousin.  Considering he was in his 20’s when this happened and is now approaching 50, it shows that people can change and sometimes it may take a while.